Just last week it dawned on me that I can actually read books for fun again! Now that there’s no grad school work to worry about, I can finally choose my own reading material. What a treat!
To start my summer reading I decided to go back… back to a favorite. I don’t often read books more than once, but some books are really worth it. I’m currently working on my second reading of Lord of the Rings, almost finished with The Fellowship of the Ring. I’m enjoying the chance to remember details I had forgotten and marvel again at the incredible world Tolkien created.
There is a line in this book (also in the movie, although at a different spot) that I really love. Frodo has just learned the truth about the Ring he inherited and about the evil growing in Middle Earth. He cries to Gandalf, “I wish it need not have happened in my time”. Gandalf replies, “So do I… and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
Lately I’ve been thinking and wondering a lot about what lies ahead in my life. Grad school gave me such a definitive goal to work towards, but now the future feels uncertain. I realized that I all too easily get caught up in trying to figure out some “perfect” path, as if I can plan all the details of where my life will lead! In doing so, I end up missing what is right in front of me – missing the time that is given to me.
The truth is, I’m not in control and I can’t map out each step of my future. But I can entrust each moment to the God who is in control. I can let go of all the unanswered questions and take hold of courage, trust and faith.
I might not know what lies ahead, but I can live every day knowing the time that is given to me is from my Father, and the very best I can do with that time is give it back to Him.